yiling_laozu | (no subject)

(no subject)

It doesn't seem quite fair that the difference between Lan Wangji's usual wake time and sunrise when the curfew lifts are nearly two hours apart. Wei Wuxian, of course, wouldn't normally be awake right now to begrudge the gods their curfew, but after being largely sequestered to bedrest (Lan Wangji's, as often as possible), he's had a lot of time to draw, and last night he'd drawn something magnificent.

Wei Wuxian shuffles through his dark room, pulling his clothes on carefully so as not to aggravate his wounds, already halfway to Odinhaus the moment sunlight first pierces the darkness. Grinning, Wei Wuxian quickens his steps, looking down at the sheath of papers in his hand. When he looks up -

"Oh! Lan Zhan!"

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He wonders if this is another list, all the places that Lan Zhan wishes to kiss him. "I'm not sure there is such a thing as too much pleasure," he answers. "And you know I don't care about what is normal. Perhaps you will shock me," he agrees, for Lan Zhan is full of surprises, "But I'm sure I will enjoy it. I'm not afraid of this 'too much' when it comes to you, Lan Zhan. You won't hurt me, and I won't allow you to hurt yourself."

He wants to thank Wei Ying. He wants to reach down and pull out things he's never said aloud. He wants to invent new words to say how much he loves him but he cannot, he can't quite do any of it how he wants. He cannot express himself as Wei Ying is able and he finds himself so overcome that he gathers Wei Ying even closer, tucking his face against Wei Ying's neck.

"Love Wei Ying," he murmurs, still careful of his side but badly wanting to just burrow in. He wants to prevent anything from ever touching Wei Ying, ever again.

"Wei Ying is good at this. Good at being a partner."

Wei Wuxian gathers him close, stroking Lan Zhan's hair as he rests against him. "I love you, too," he says, and wonders if it's true. So many times he has struck out alone because it was right. Most of those times, of late, Lan Zhan has come with him. Perhaps it's he who is good at being a partner.

"I hope I am," he says quietly. "All I ever wanted - " he says and stops, rephrasing.
"I've always wanted to belong somewhere. Even better to someone, but it never seemed possible."

"Wei Ying has belonged to people but they were taken from him," Lan Zhan says, rubbing his thumb along Wei Ying's knuckles. He thinks of Wei Ying living on the streets as a child, hungry and afraid. He thinks of the murders of Madam Yu and Jiang Fengmian. Of the loss of Jiang Yangli.

It's too much. Far too much loss for one lifetime.

"Lan Zhan belongs to Wei Ying, now. And Wei Ying to Lan Zhan. We will watch out for each other. Keep each other safe."

Edited 2020-01-28 02:52 (UTC)

Wei Wuxian sighs. It's true that everyone he once called family is gone. In this place, even Wen Ning and A-Yuan are separated from him. Lan Zhan is enough. He will always be more than enough, but even so, Wei Wuxian misses them all so much.

"We will look out for each other," he agrees, shifting so that Lan Zhan must look at him. "Beginning with your breakfast, which you have not finished."

Lan Zhan cannot help the huff of surprised, helpless laughter, immediately ducking his head out of instinct as his shoulders shake.

"It is cold," he murmurs, unable to look at Wei Ying but still enjoying the ability to whine, just a little bit. Food is not to go cold but at all costs, food is especially never to go uneaten.

"Would Wei Ying like something to drink? Have tea or may allow a little wine."

"Lan Zhan is laughing," says Wei Wuxian, eyes wide. It is so extraordinary that he nearly forgets to feel guilty over ruining his meal. "I'm sorry," he says, rubbing Lan Zhan's shuddering back, "I was too distracting. Surely the kitchens could warm it for us? And tea."

Tea is better while his belly is full. Wine will work far better when it is not.

"Wei Ying's distraction is a good trade for cold soup," says, leaning up to kiss Wei Ying's cheek before sitting up and kneeing carefully off the bed.

There is no need for such a luxury as warming the soup. The small confession (such as it was) that he did not enjoy cold soup was enjoyable enough. More would be ridiculous. "Tea is still warm," he promises, setting out two cups to pour, one with a little honey already added to the bottom.

"Does Wei Ying have other ideas for screens?"

"Nothing so fleshed out as the bunny path," says Wei Wuxian, gladly accepting the tea. He's never much cared whether he drank it or water, but it's been harder to keep warm since his injury, and the warmth against his palms is welcome.

"The pond, perhaps, in front of the Silent Room. The Cold Cave. Does Lan Zhan have any requests?"

The thinks, briefly, of gentians. He thinks of the trees in front of his mother's house, blooming purple and entirely out of place every spring. But it seems somehow inappropriate, too tragic, perhaps.

He shakes his head, wishing he knew enough of Lotus Pier to make specific suggestions of his own.

"And of Wei Ying's home? Screens for Lotus Pier? he asks before picking up his own tea.

"There will already be lotuses in the wooden panels," says Wei Wuxian, though he would hardly mind more. "Perhaps," he says, his eyes somehow both darkening and shining with new light, "There could be a special series in the bedroom. The exploits of the Yiling Patriarch and Hanguang-Jun. The tortoise, the dancing goddess, the fall of Wen Rouhan!"

How a person could endure in such a room and not get their blood up is beyond him. He wonders if they would ever leave.

"Cannot dedicate a bedroom to praising our exploits," Lan Zhan mildly, even as he hides the beginnings of a smile behind his cup.

He makes a mental note to check any art projects Wei Ying plans for their bedroom. That is a look that does not bode well if left unchecked.

"Want a proper bathtub," he decides, feeling a little bold at the declaration. "Big enough for both of us."

"That will be a very large bath," laughs Wei Wuxian, and it is not a no. "In the style of our homeland, yes? Not the strange, shallow long ones." Wei Wuxian has found he prefers rain-like showering now that it is known to him, but one need only insert Lan Zhan into the tub to hasten its siren call.

And he will make those screens. It is their own room, no one will see them anyway! There could even be a special, double-sided one surrounding the tub. One with lots of room for exploits.

It would be an entirely ridiculous bathtub. It would be indulgent, a waste of materials and entirely inappropriate.

Lan Zhan very much wants one.

"Mm, only babies lie down in the bath water," he intones, forehead creasing in distaste at the thought of the communal, coffin like bathtub down the hallway. "Like the idea of washing Wei Ying's hair for him."

"Oh," says Wei Wuxian at once, "You must, it is my least favorite task." But the thought of Lan Zhan's long fingers in his hair each day, massaging his scalp and meticulously coaxing out tangles...this is a tub that must be made with stout material indeed.

He cocks his head. "I think I would like washing yours, though. Even if it were not attached to you, it is like silk. Mine has its own mind when it is wet."

The idea of Wei Ying doing so to him is enticing enough to make Lan Zhan pause, trying to imagine that such indulgence could be his. There would be no rule against it in this place. The thought is frightening it is so foreign.

"Like Wei Ying's hair," he finally murmurs, watching as even now unruly pieces stick out in waves. "Would not suit Wei Ying to have hair that behaved. Like the waves and the curls when it is wet. Suits you."

Wei Wuxian looks up to find Lan Zhan's eyes fixed to the area around his topknot. It is messier than usual, for reaching up eventually causes him pain, but now he wonders if even this is too much. Is his messy hair enticing?

It is certainly an avenue to be explored. Wei Wuxian grins. "Ah. This is your ploy to keep me in the bathtub."

"Hanguang-Jun would not do such a thing," he murmurs, face entirely shameless as he moves back to the bed and starts to unwind Wei Ying's ribbon. He cannot fault him but it does look like a child's attempt and Lan Zhan very much wants to touch his hair.

"But I do like Wei Ying's hair. Like that only I touch it."

Wei Wuxian closes his eyes, relaxing as Lan Zhan's fingers slide into his hair. The unwinding of his ribbon is oddly thrilling - Lan Zhan must have felt this way when Wei Wuxian first touched his headband and he did not hate it.

"Lan Zhan is so romantic," he exhales. "If the maidens at home had known, not even the barrier to the Cloud Recesses could have kept them out."

"Lan Zhan is not romantic with anyone but Wei Ying," he corrects, scooting closer and grabbing his own comb from his desk. He carefully works through the tangles at the front of Wei Ying's head. The little waves and textures still want to spring out and Lan Zhan is fascinated. It's so different from his own.

"Maidens would not want Lan Wangji. Only Wei Ying wants Lan Wangji. Good that way."

"Impossible," answers Wei Wuxian. He's only just risen, but his lids feel heavy beneath Lan Zhan's ministrations. "Even Nie Huaisang could not help himself exclaiming your beauty each time you left the room. I wish I could tell them all now who ended up with you."

Even his uncle. Perhaps especially his uncle. And Madam Yu.

That is incredibly disconcerting.

Lan Zhan cannot imagine Nie Huaisang saying such a thing and finds himself a little unsettled at the idea as he continues to brush out his hair. He has heard comment on his looks but not in such direct terms. It was usually around his coldness and he would prefer to think Wei Ying is the only person to ever think about Lan Zhan's attractiveness.

"Would like to have it known as well. Proud to be with Wei Ying."

Wei Ying is the single most beautiful person Lan Zhan has ever seen but without any of the coldness that Lan Zhan knows pervades his own face. Wei Ying is exquisite.

It takes Lan Zhan a beat longer to answer this time, and Wei Wuxian grins. "Is Lan Zhan embarrassed to draw attention? I will make your life more difficult, then, by telling you that you draw every eye in the room."

He tilts his head back. "I know you are. When I returned, you never let me stand alone again. Once, I even pushed you!" Wei Wuxian exclaims. "But you came right back."

"Not exactly embarrassed," he murmurs, scooting up the bed so he is sitting right at the top of the bed to better reach the sides and back of Wei Ying's head. "Do not enjoy attention. Also, I think Wei Ying is not entirely accurate. Wei Ying draws attention. Wei Ying is powerful and uncommonly beautiful. Lan Wangji is quiet so stories are spun to fill that void," he decides.

He is very pleased that this version of him has learned from past mistakes. His biggest regret is not being by Wei Ying's side when he needed him most. It's not a mistake he will ever make again.

Wei Ying is also very loud, but he's enjoying the praise and doesn't voice his suspicions. It's enough that Lan Zhan thinks so. "Lan Zhan will make me blush," he teases.

"I suppose that's partly true," he says. "I imagined all sorts of things about you when we first met. Your mystery is very intriguing. Another reason you could send maidens into a frenzy."