yiling_laozu | (no subject)

"You're looking at one, babe," Klaus replies with a wink, clicking his tongue and aiming a finger gun towards Wei Wuxian. "You have such a sweet face for someone who goes looking for trouble. As did I, once upon a time."

He's been through too much to have a sweet face anymore, he thinks, but he used to. It helped him get into all sorts of trouble. The fun kind and the messy kind.

"We can go rob a liquor store if you need to get your jollies off," he says in a flat sort of tone, waggling his eyebrows as he sips from his drink. Actually, he probably shouldn't joke like that. Him and Wei Wuxian could probably cause all sorts of chaos if they really put their heads together.

He doesn't at all understand the origin of the finger gun, but Wei Wuxian likes the look and spirit of it very much, parroting it back at Klaus across the table as he giggles at the thought of a whole liquor store to themselves.

"There are so many kinds of liquor here," he notes. "At home we only had one, many variations of it it's true, but just the one. Here there are all sorts!" Wei Wuxian takes another long sip from his drink. "I like them all so much. Do you have a favorite, Klaus-gonxi?"

"Was it something like sake?" Klaus asks, hoping that wasn't an offensive assumption to make. It just seems like a good guess. "Much like with men and women, I cannot commit to one lover. Whiskey does have a special place in my heart, though."

Wei Wuxian's happy, earnest face sets Klaus at ease. It makes him wistful for a time he doesn't really think that he ever had. From what he's heard, the guy has been through hell, but he didn't seem to let it harden him. Klaus admires that.

"Come closer to me," Klaus says with a tipsy wave of his hand, scooting further into the rounded booth. "Your hair is shiny and I must touch it."

Edited 2021-01-23 08:58 (UTC)

"Shénme?" Wei Wuxian giggles, though he slides around the booth at once. Lan Wangji likes his hair particularly well, but it's not nearly as shiny as his, nor his lovely shijie's. Probably the result of sleeping so long on a bed a straw. Wei Wuxian doesn't worry after it, but he delights in the compliment all the same.

"I think it must be like sake," he agrees, for he's tasted that a few times when no one has the rice wine he favors from home. "The other drinks...they put them into concoctions like this for me, but I don't know what they are." He shrugs, eying Klaus curiously. "Have you really had so many lovers? Men and women both?"

When Wei Wuxian shifts closer, Klaus smiles delightedly and reaches out to take a lock of it between his fingers just to feel the glide of it. His own hair can never decide how much curl it wants to have but it's always a lot, so of course he likes the feel of sleek, straight hair.

The term lovers makes his nose wrinkle in slight distaste, but he doesn't say anything about it because he doesn't even know what he would suggest in its stead. The question is far more interesting anyway, so he'll let it slide. He knows what Wei Wuxian means, so he'll roll with it.

"Yes, very many," he says easily, without shame. He's a consenting adult. What he gets up to with other consenting adults is no one else's concern. He smiles at Wei Wuxian and then straightens up a little, letting go of his shiny hair to reach up and tap at the collar of his shirt, tugging it down a little to reveal a mouth-shaped smudge of a bruise on his clavicle. "I took a lover just last night. And I may very well go get loved on tonight."

Wei Wuxian gazes at the bruise approvingly. These he knows, for Lan Wangji tends to mark him with both lips and teeth and sometimes fingerprints, and Wei Wuxian loves to press on them after, recalling how they were made.

He fidgets after, turning his drink in his hands. The questions that suddenly crowd his mind aren't at all appropriate, but they've been eating at him for days, and Klaus may be the perfect person to answer them. "Then Klaus-gonxi must be very experienced," he ventures. "With men?"

"Klaus-gonxi is very experienced with men," he says before taking another sip, because he thinks that he knows where this is going. It's kind of a surprise, them possibly not having had sex yet, just because they seem so intense about each other.

"Klaus-gonxi also loves talking about sex with men." Giving him a knowing smirk, he lifts his drink to take another long sip. This should be fun. "If that's what you're heading toward."

Wei Wuxian is not easily embarrassed, but he colors faintly, glancing towards the door as if Lan Wangji might suddenly, impossibly appear in a tavern of all places. But of course he doesn't, and he looks back at Klaus' thankfully solicitous face.

"Has Klaus-gonxi..." he begins. "Has he put his...fingers, in anyone? I think I might not be good at it," he says with a huff, for Wei Wuxian is usually good at most things, "But I don't know how I am meant to learn."

Klaus almost laughs at the question, but he reels it in because he doesn't want Wei Wuxian to be embarrassed. It's just so funny to Klaus, who has had his fingers in so many people, all over the world. He's kind of an expert on the topic.

"If you can think of it, I've probably done it," Klaus assures him, sipping of his drink before setting it down and looking over at Wei Wuxian with a quirked brow. "So you've come to right person."

After setting his drink down, he reaches over and picks up Wei Wuxian's hand to inspect his fingers. "Clean, trimmed nails is step one."

Wei Wuxian quickly studies his hands, open-mouthed. Such a simple thing, and yet he had not thought of it at all when Lan Wangji made his desires known. Thankfully, his nails are neat, and he'd just been washing up in the kitchen when Lan Wangji had come home.

"I did that well," he says, smiling tentatively. "And I found that strange little place inside him, but it took some time."

"Ah, so you've already done it. And you found the prostate!" Klaus says excitedly, just as a cocktail waitress comes by to see if they want any refills, so Klaus presses a quick, friendly pick to Wei Wuxian's fingers before letting go of his hand. "Yep! Another round on my friend's tab, please." He winks over at Wei Wuxian. "Consider it my consultation fee."

Once the waitress turns and leaves, Klaus tips his head to check out her ass, mostly out of habit, and then turns back to Wei Wuxian. "It sounds relatively successful. Did something go wrong?"

He wrinkles his nose a bit. "Did you not use lube?"

Wei Wuxian nods, thinking nothing of the coin he'll hand over before leaving this tavern. Lan Wangji - long the wealthiest man Wei Wuxian has ever known - keeps track of all their expenses, leaving Wei Wuxian to spend his coin on whatever dalliances he fancies. If he drinks enough, he might even buy a round for the whole bar.

"We had oil," Wei Wuxian says, nodding. "But...especially at the beginning, I felt foolish and out of my depth. Lan Zhan is..." Again he hesitates, feeling guilt at sharing so much of what Lan Wangji keeps behind a tightly closed mouth. "He does not often allow himself pleasure. It is one of the rules of his clan. When he does, I wish to be extraordinary."

"Well, if he never has pleasure, I'm pretty sure whatever you do will feel extraordinary to him," Klaus tells him easily, crunching down on a chip of ice as he lifts his brows. "You're the first, right? So you're the best he's ever had. Think of it that way."

Their drinks are set down and Klaus thanks their waitress with a smile before pulling it closer and taking a drink. "Get some lube for next time. Pay attention to how he's reacting and respond as needed, and it'll be good."

He takes another sip of his drink and reaches out with his other hand to tap the bow of Wei Wuxian's upper lip. "You could also use that pretty mouth of yours. That'd really blow his mind."

Wei Wuxian has never thought of it this way. Right now he is Lan Wangji's first and only. It makes him feel even worse for dying and leaving him, but surely that's all the more reason to make their stolen time in Darrow the best it can be.

"Around his manhood?" Wei Wuxian asks, perking up at the tap to his lips. "I like doing that. Is there something I can do to make it the very best it can be?"

Oh god, his manhood. He talks like a romance novel and it's precious.

"I was talking about using your mouth where you're putting your fingers," he says with a quirked brow, wondering if perhaps this never occurred to him. Klaus can't help but to think about Obi-Wan's reaction when Klaus rimmed him for the first time, and a pleased smile graces his face. That had been a great day.

"But if you need blowjob tips, I can do that." His cheeks hollow around his straw as he sips from his drink, and he looks around uselessly. "Damn, I wish they had popsicles here."

His mouth can go there? Wei Wuxian has only just learned that fingers can, and now mouths? It sounds deliciously filthy in the way Lan Wangji keeps surprising him by enjoying, and Wei Wuxian makes a note to discover more. But now he jumps, startled by the sudden presence of someone next to them.

"Frozen margarita pop?" the woman asks, extending something colorful on a stick towards both of them. The confection is so pretty that Wei Wuxian is almost too distracted to note that her hair appears to be more vines than hair, shifting as if in a hidden breeze. He blinks but accepts it, turning back to Klaus. "I like this place very much."

"Rimjobs," Klaus says in response to the look on Wei Wuxian's face, like he's just been enlightened. "Perfect activity for just after bathing."

The both of them jump when popsicles are suddenly being held out to them, and Klaus wonders if that's part of what makes this magical bar so special. If his needs are catered to so specifically here, it'll be hard for him to go anywhere else. If his powers count as magic, he assumes Obi's would, too. They'll have to come together sometime.

But for now, blowjob lessons.

"That's what I call service," Klaus says happily, reaching out to take his own popsicle. He watches the woman go, and then turns his attention back to Wei Wuxian, looking at him as he leans in to catch a drip at the base of the popsicle with his tongue. "Okay, show me how you did it. I'll do my best not to get aroused."

He says it like a joke, but Wei Wuxian does have a very pretty mouth. Still, he knows that he has no shot at hooking up with him, so he doesn't bother trying. The flirting, though. That he can't stop.

Wei Wuxian giggles. "Here?" The thought is quite shocking, and Wei Wuxian is just the shameless sort to enjoy it all the more. Still, his ordinary shocking behavior isn't at all prurient, and he colors a little as he studies the popsicle. For Lan Wangji, he will do this.

Brow furrowed in resolve, Wei Wuxian opens his mouth, closing it around the frozen treat. It's not at all like Lan Wangji's cock - it's frigid, the way he'd once thought Lan Wangji to be, but now he knows how hotly he burns. Still, the shape isn't too far off, and Wei Wuxian lifts his eyes to Klaus', watching him for guidance as he begins to slide his mouth up and down the pop. "You can't see it," he says after a moment, pulling the treat free. "But I try to keep my tongue flat? It's good if he can feel more of it, yes?"

"Why not?" Klaus shrugs and then makes a go on gesture with his hand. To his credit, Wei Wuxian just completely goes for it, and Klaus can't help but to admire his boldness. And then he admires other things, but he thinks that he can't be blamed for that.

"Looks good from here," he says with an amused huff of laughter, nodding as he sits up a little straighter with his own popsicle. "You could give him a a few licks first, and then yes, relaxed tongue." He opens his mouth for his own popsicle and then stops himself to hold his hand up in a cupping motion. "And don't be afraid to play with the balls. Really get in there."

He puts on his own demonstration with the popsicle, dragging his tongue along it a few times before sliding it into his mouth and sliding it in and out a few times. Just to show off, he tips his head back and relaxes his throat, eyes watering slightly as he tips it into his throat. He pulls it out with a pop and reaches up to wipe at the corner of his mouth.

"Do that and the fingers at the same time," he says, pointing at Wei Wuxian with the popsicle before making an exploding motion with his free hand. "With the lube you're going to go buy. Really blow his mind."

"The balls? The - oh!" Wei Wuxian cuts himself off as Klaus fondles at the air, understanding the gesture even if he's not sure why that would feel good. He's going to try it, regardless.

Then Klaus tips his head and does something with his throat, looking both relaxed and strained at the same time before he pulls the popsicle free once more. "What were you doing just then?" Wei Wuxian asks, finding Klaus' voice just the slightest bit more hoarse than before. "Does it feel good for him if I swallow?"

"Oh, totally," Klaus says with a grin, remembering vividly how Obi-Wan reacted the first time Klaus swallowed him down. He looked at Klaus like he was something magical, and he'll never forget the look on his face. "It sure blew Obi-Wan's mind."

A pleased smile graces Klaus's face and he licks around the base of the popsicle to catch any drips. "It might take some practice, but it's definitely worth it."

He looks over at Wei Wuxian and quirks an eyebrow, tipping his head curiously. "Are yiu guys going to try penetrative sex, or are you working up to that?"

Wei Wuxian giggles, both delighted and curious at the thought of Klaus and the comparatively more stately Obi-Wan indulging in one another. He has Questions, but Klaus' question makes him swallow them all.

He's quiet long enough that his popsicle drips down over his fingers, and Wei Wuxian frowns rather than lick the droplets up. "We will," he says. "We want to. Only it's..." He trails off again. "It feels like an important step between us," he says. "And there are things he doesn't know. Things about me that would upset him. I'm not lying, exactly, but to lie with him when I know things he doesn't...it feels wrong of me, Klaus-gonxi."

Wei Wuxian's reaction delights Klaus, because he thinks that he and Obi-Wan probably do seem like an odd match to outsiders, but they aren't, not really. They have more in common than most people would assume, and they work very well together. That, and Klaus is deeply smug to have bagged someone so incredibly hot, but that's a little more superficial.

"Ah, see. Usually I prefer that the people that I'm fucking don't know anything about me, so I'm not sure that I'll be of much help in that regard," Klaus tells him, shrugging helplessly before slurping on his popsicle, mostly now because he doesn't want to deal with drips. "But maybe just rip the bandage off. Tell him and see what happens, or you'll just stress about it and it'll probably eventually come out anyway."

Eventually, the popsicle gets a little too sticky and Klaus sticks it into his empty water glass. After grabbing a napkin, he holds one hand up in surrender. "Please be advised, while I am very confident in my advice, my relationship advice comes with no such guarantee."